3
out of 5.00 -
Film:
2
Extras:
2
Video:
4
Audio:
4
-
9/11/2000
AMERICAN GARTER, an original release from the early nineties, was popularly heralded for the return of legendary porn superstar Seka, a blonde bombshell who burned the silver screen (when porn movies actually played in theaters) and television tubes for her wild sexual performances. As directed by the equally legendary Henri Pachard and former adult actress Gloria Leonard, this moderately budgeted release looks terrific and the DVD is an excellent transfer of the original 35mm film source which nicely captures the 1960s setting and of course, fashions. The premise of the film involves the undergarment industry (which unfortunately, had not yet evolved to Victoria's Secret standards), giving ample opportunity for plenty of sexual situations between models and the designers (at least the ones who aren't gay) and placing it in a business setting.
Unfortunately, despite a supporting cast which includes underrated favorites like Sierra, Nicole London, Heather Hart and the delectable Selena Steele, AMERICAN GARTER succeeds a little too well as being a real film (that is, if it were being played on Skinemax), at the expense of its erotic potential. For one thing, there are only six major sex scenes in the entire under-ninety minute running time, and none of them are exceptional in the least bit. Also, some of the hairdos on the actresses border on the ridiculous, despite their authenticity. Melanie Moore, for example, looks like a blonde Ed Grimley in her threesome with Nicole London and Tony Tedeschi. Tiffany Million looks like she stuck her head in a bucket of glue, although she still maintains her animal-like sexual prowess in her straight scene with Steve Drake. Although I enjoy seeing women in garters and other lingerie, the elaborate costumes are still not enough to detract from the mousse and gel infested hairstyles. I happen to be one of those porn viewers who cannot stand to see the feminine objects of his affection being afflicted with all sorts of bad make-up or costume jobs, so all the Marge Simpson-ish hairdos and Bride of Frankenstein bouffants really got on my nerves.
And as much as I enjoy seeing most "older" porn queens return back to their profession, I'm afraid that Seka's comeback is just a little too late in the porn game. Unlike Ginger Lynn (who made a sensational appearance in TORN, proving that even after a decade long absence, she was still hotter and sexier than any combination of Jennas, Janines or Jasmins), or Shanna McCullough (who shed all inhibitions in I SWALLOW 1 and 2 and took cum-eating to a whole new level of nastiness), or even Christy Canyon (who is greeted with open arms and zippers from her legion of fans with each comeback), Seka's return to blue movies is absolutely uneventful. She appears in four scenes in AMERICAN GARTER, but is constantly outshined by her female co-stars. In a bathroom threesome Seka takes a back seat to the incredibly cute Sierra, who absolutely burned in Evil Angel's FACE DANCE and generates more than 90% of the erotic heat in this film. She is also the only one who gets a cumshot closest to the face (although most of the man goo falls right back on the guy's crotch). Seka also performs with Nick East and Randy West, but I saw very little of her legendary sexual magnetism at work. Clearly, Seka seemed far less interested in regaining her popularity than she was making a quick buck.
Even though Seka disappoints, I had hoped that I could find comfort and solace in the siliconed bosom one of the best performers ever to appear in adult films, Selena Steele. But while I have sung her praises in movies like THE LAST RESORT, CURSE OF THE CATWOMAN and ANYTHING THAT MOVES, I'm afraid that she is sorely underused in a guy-girl scene with Jonathan Morgan which occurs at the same time Randy is getting it on with the featured performer. Selena gives blowjobs which rank right up there with some of the best head-givers, including Tiffany Mynx, Ginger Lynn, Tori Welles and Leena, but you wouldn't know it from this movie. The camera lingers far too long on Seka, and during all her on-screen time, I was impatiently waiting to see Selena again. Even Ona Zee, who deep-throats like her life depended on it in an early guy-girl-guy encounter, has her scene ruined by Mike Horner's embarrassing inability to maintain wood. Naturally, the directors "fake" the money shot by implying that he came inside of her, but even the most novice of porn viewers know better. I'm puzzled that a production of this caliber would not simply give us a second take of this otherwise very good scene, but oh well...
Again, the 35mm look of this film is excellent, and the sound is clean and clear. As with all VCA Classics, extras are limited to a photo gallery, scene selection and other VCA promotional items.
AMERICAN GARTER is an ambitious effort, but one that disappoints. Even hardcore Seka fans might want to wait for her back catalog of classic films (like ANYTIME, ANYPLACE or ROCKIN' WITH SEKA) to be released on DVD before getting this one.
By:
Diesel