WARNING - Operating This "Machine" May Induce Drowsiness. 2.5 out of 5.00 - Film: 2 Extras: 2 Video: 3 Audio: 3 - 9/15/2002
Ok, I will be upfront about the fact that I do not like "interactive" gaming. I hated "Myst," never played "Dungeons and Dragons" and spent my entire time playing "Halo" on an X-Box aimlessly walking down dead-end corridors looking for things to kill since I had no idea what the point of the goddamn game was. I am a purist. I want to turn on a video game and use a single joystick to blast some aliens or spaceships for a bit, get a score, turn it off, and leave. I don't want to endure a 20-minute "backstory," roam around a virtual reality for hours and days collecting clues, weapons and codes to advance to the next challenge, etc., etc., etc. I have a life (more or less) and don't want to waste countless hours of it discovering the intricacies of a VR world created by some geek. Unfortunately, THE DREAM MACHINE 2, an "interactive" adult game DVD from New Machine, reminded me of everything I hate about these types of diversions.

The stated premise of DM2 is that in a future, "Terminator"-esque world, sex is outlawed and only exists in VR on the internet. Unfortunately, the government is trying to stifle that too by dispatching killer viruses to wipe out the lovely VR ladies. If you can find the right weapons, you can kill the viruses and have your way with the grateful VR ladies. Sounds thrilling, huh?

Although you can apparently go to New Machine's website for a direct sex access code (which will only be e-mailed to you after providing New Machine with all your personal info - no thanks), I figured I would review this 3-disc set on the basis of its stated purpose, to be an interactive sex game. On that basis, in a nutshell, it stinks.

First, like most such interactive discs, my 3-year old Compaq computer couldn't handle it and froze up, leaving me to watch it on my regular DVD player. Even on my new DVD player, the movement around the repetitive VR environment is slow and irritating. Short of drawing yourself a map, there is nothing on the screen to indicate where you are or where your next VR sex conquest might be had. After initially being killed by a "virus" (who was in the middle of banging a digitized victim), I managed to find a weapon through blind luck. I killed the bad guy and was rewarded with some interactive sex with a trim, attractive brunette (Alexis Dane?). Based on menu commands at the bottom of the screen, you are able to sweet-talk her out of her dress, have her play with herself, engage in some girl-girl action with an attractive blonde, and participate in some straight action with a faceless male VR counterpart, including getting some liquid binary code on her pretty face. These segments are routine yet fairly enjoyable and well photographed.

Thankfully, unlike many interactive adult discs, the action is filmed against a white background, allowing for better viewing. Once I had enjoyed this segment for a bit, I attempted to find another such experience on disc 1, but with no luck. I have no idea if there were more VR lovelies to be rescued on disc 1 but I'll be damned if I could find them. My aimless stumbling around the dreary VR environment on this disc did result in the discovery of some New Machine previews. However, when I clicked on them, instead of getting some monkeyspanking material, I merely got a numeric code to enter on disc 3 so I could see the preview (aaaarrrrggghhhh!!!!). (Normally, when I sit down to beat my meat to a porno I don't have paper and pen handy to jot down code numbers.)

I gave up on disc 1 and put disc 2 in my player. However, some other sort of numeric code was required to get started on that disc. Needless, to say, I calmly opened my player, took out the disc and smashed it on the ground.

Maybe someone who is good at these types of VR games would have hours of enjoyment collecting codes and clues and exploring all the similar looking corridors and elevators in search of some interactive poontang. I am not and found DREAM MACHINE 2 to be a time consuming, boring, frustrating mess. I would probably get a faster hard-on playing "Tomb Raider." The meager sexual pickings you might be able to find after countless hours of wandering around the VR world and development of carpal tunnel syndrome from all the DVD remote control usage is not worth the effort.

If you want a fun, no-hassle computer game stick with "Simpsons' Road Rage" for X-Box and if you want great, non-stop trousersnake wrestling material, I recommend any number of other great entries from New Machine, especially Randy West's "Up & Cummers" series, one of the best ongoing titles in porndom. In the meantime, avoid DREAM MACHINE 2 like a computer virus.

      By: Joe Blow

The Real Deal. 4.5 out of 5.00 - Film: 4 Extras: 5 Video: 5 Audio: 4 - 9/25/2002
In a nutshell, there is nothing out there even close to The Dream Machine. Yeah, it can be tought to navigate and it certainly is frustrating to get "killed" all the time and have to start over, but isn't that the point?

If you want straight-ahead porn without having to "work" for it, then check out the Dirty Debutantes or Up and Cummers series by New Machine. But if you enjoy playing video games and being "rewarded" for your hard work, then The Dream Machine is the ticket!

      - Cyberporn